A big, blue shift
A big, blue shiftIt’s Wednesday. There are 335 days until the midterm elections. Trump made jobs go bye-bye, Sabrina Carpenter schools the White House and Tennessee scares the GOP.Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. But George Will never called it a “sickening moral slum.” Housekeeping note: There won’t be a therapy session today as Adam is traveling but we will let you know when this week we plan on doing it! Love y’all! Note: Shhhhhhhh!!! Be quiet, Sexy Patriots. You might wake up the president of the United States. And that’s rude to do to someone while they’re going to the bathroom… Trump dozes while Marco Rubio speaks to him directly next to him. Just insane optics. Tue, 02 Dec 2025 18:46:40 GMT View on BlueskyAdorable. Bet he’s dreaming about chasing cars. Oh wait. He’s not adorable at all. And he’s probably dreaming about some pretty fucked up shit! And by that we mean he’s definitely dreaming about Ivanka. Ewwww. Yeah, the guy who attacked the last guy as “sleepy,” can’t seem to stay awake these days. Probably because he stays up all night posting QAnon theories, which also doesn’t seem great. Does anyone else remember when the mainstream media thought the health and fitness of the president was the most important story ever LIKE SIX FUCKING MONTHS AGO?! Yeah, we feel your rage over the double-standard, but we’re going to surprise you here — we say let him sleep. Yeah, quit waking this asshole up. We were gonna announce a whole WAKE UP campaign aimed at America and our narcoleptic nutjob prez, but then we remembered he sucks worse when he’s awake. At least when he’s asleep, he’s not actively hurting anyone or spewing racist shit out of his gross mouth. We assume he still smells like wide-open ass though. So let the man rest. While it’s true that he’s not working nearly as hard as the diapers he’s wearing, he still gets tuckered out. After all, it must be exhausting being that fucking awful all the time. Y’all have a blessed day. Note two: How racist was asshead yesterday? Even the New York Times called out his “unapologetic bigotry.” More: New York Times Note three: We thought Rep. Omar’s response was absolutely perfect. And she’s right. Trump’s obsession with her is creepy as hell. More: Mediaite Note four: You won’t be shocked to learn that Putin’s bitches didn’t end the war. Trump even sucks at surrendering. More: HuffPost Note five: This greedy motherfucker heard of Giving Tuesday for the first time yesterday. Worst poker face ever. Trump is surprised by the words in his teleprompter: "Today is Giving Tuesday -- I don't know if anyone has heard that one before -- but it is indeed Giving Tuesday." Tue, 02 Dec 2025 19:59:54 GMT View on BlueskyNote six: The anti-vaxx freaks are meeting this week. We can’t wait to find out how they’re going to kill more kids. More: NBC News Note seven: Trump is threatening to starve more Americans. Thank goodness that fucker is a Christian or we’d really be in trouble. More: NBC News Note eight: That George Will thing is brutal. He calls Hegseth a war criminal without a war. And he’s right. More: Mediaite Note nine: This drunken racoon is the spirit animal we needed for 2025. And he’s probably our next Secretary of Defense. More: Associated Press Note 10: They really are the dumbest, most incompetent motherfuckers on the planet. Or they’re nazis. And at this point we think it’s both. Pete Hegseth's nameplate during today's cabinet meeting featured an unfortunate error. (Andrew Caballero-Reynolds/AFP via Getty) Tue, 02 Dec 2025 20:18:37 GMT View on BlueskyNote 11: Demand Justice is going after John Fetterman and Maggie Hassan for being Trump stooges. Good. Send a message. More: Associated Press Note 12: The right is upset about a pink sweater. We think it’s pretty cool. Sam wears lots of pink. Because it’s cool and it looks good. Also, if you’re upset about a sweater, then go get some therapy. More: HuffPost Note 13: Sleepy old child rape guy now says that “affordability is a scam.” LOL. Sharp messaging. Definitely go with that. Note 14: Look, we’re glad that Larry Summers is tasting some accountability for being an Epstein creep, but we just don’t get why the president of the United States is getting a pass. More: Associated Press Note 15: Just a reminder that healthcare premiums about to spike for millions of Americans and Republicans are focused on a fucking ballroom. More: Associated Press Note 16: Jake Tapper is a bitch. That’s the note. More: Mediaite Note 17: The new Pentagon press corps looks really gross and rapey. get a load of the "journalist" asking questions at the Pentagon press briefing Tue, 02 Dec 2025 16:21:52 GMT View on BlueskyNote 18: It didn’t even occur to us to thank Trump for keeping the hurricanes away. Of course we’ve never shot any puppies in the face either. More: Mediaite Note 19: For today’s Happy Ending, we’re going on down to Georgia. While we didn’t get the big W in Tennessee we all hoped for, we did flip a mayoral seat in Roswell. Big congrats to Mayor-elect Mary Robichaux. Suck it, Kurt Wilson. More: 11Alive Note 20: And on that victory note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all are having a lovely week. And we changed our minds. Don’t be quiet. Be loud as fuck so that this asshole president knows what’s coming next November. Love y’all! Ruh-roh We stan Sabrina They scared Today’s clips After a quiet start, the first American pope appears to be finding his voice. More: NBC News The Trump administration could expand its travel ban to include as many as 30 countries, according to multiple reports. More: HuffPost A federal immigration crackdown began Wednesday in New Orleans under an operation that a Homeland Security official said would target violent criminals, expanding the Trump administration’s sweeps that have unfolded in other U.S. cities. More: HuffPost Sen. Mark Kelly (D-AZ) said he’s received “graphic” and “violent” threats since President Donald Trump called for him and other Democrats to be arrested and put on trial. More: Mediaite Fox News host Laura Ingraham asked FBI Director Kash Patel about his use of the bureau’s jet to attend various recreational events across the country. More: Mediaite |
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